MontanaFacts&Fun
Montana
Weekly For 03-24-03
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BAD JOKE
MONDAY
Mexico is planning to remain our
ally in the impending war against Iraq.
Their army will teach ours how to sneak over the border
at night. Jay Leno
***
Even if you can't carry a tune, you can still karaoke.
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INSTRUCTIONS
FOR LIFE
"It is by the goodness of God
that we have in our country three
unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom
of conscience,
and the prudence never to practice either." Mark
Twain
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FREE!
DINNER FOR TWO AT
PERKIN'S FAMILY RESTAURANT AND BAKERY
Cedar Street & I-15 - Helena, Montana
Open 24 hours - Great Family Dining
Free dinner includes entree, drinks and dessert.
Winner will be drawn at 5 PM Tuesday 03-25-03.
TO ENTER SEND E-MAIL TO
fortune@mtsky.com
Just say "YES, I'll take the dinner for two!"
Name
________________________________Phone__________________
Last week's winner - Rep. Joe
Balyeat - R - HD 32 - Bozeman
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THOUGHTS WHILE WAITING TO TESTIFY
AT A LEGISLATIVE HEARING
The higher type of man clings to
virtue, the lower type of man clings to material comfort.
The higher type of man cherishes justice, the lower
type of man cherishes the hope of favors to be
received. Confucius
(551-479 BC)
***
Thought is the blossom; language the bud; action the
fruit behind it. Emerson
***
Some people
are always grumbling because roses have thorns.
I am thankful that thorns have roses. Allophones
Karr
***
We judge
ourselves by what we feel capable of doing,
while others judge us by what we have already done. Longfellow
***
The potential of the average person is
like a huge ocean unsailed,
a new continent unexplored, a world of possibilites
waiting to be
released and channeled toward some great good. Brian
Tracy
***
Better to do something imperfectly
than to do nothing flawlessly. Robert
Schuller
***
It takes
less time to do a thing right,
than it does to explain why you did it wrong. Longfellow
***
SESSION
STATISTICS AS OF 03/21/2003
Introduced Bills:
1316 * Unintroduced Bills: 864 * Total: 2180
Bills Active in the House: 269 * Bills Active in the
Senate: 312
Resolutions Adopted: 15 * Bills on Governor's Desk: 58
Bills Signed by Governor: 90
Bills Returned with Governor's Amendments: 2
Bills Tabled in House Committee: 89
Bills Indefinitely Postponed in Senate Committee: 64
Failed/Probably Dead in the House: 201
Failed/Probably Dead in the Senate: 123
Drafts Cancelled: 343
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Helena
Last Chancers Barbershop Chorus
IT'S THIS WEEK! * DON'T MISS IT!
The
Helena Last Chancers Barbershop Chorus has joined with
the Bozeman Chord Rustlers Barbershop Chorus to bring a
show of harmony and humor to the Helena Middle School
Auditorium, March 29, 2003, at 7:30
p.m. Also performing, besides the combined men's
chorus (about 50 men for a full, wonderful
sound) will be three men's barbershop quartets and
Helena's Sleeping Giant Chorus of Sweet Adelines.
The show, called "Frontier Daze, Unwanted Courage:
The Lost Journals of Smith and Garfinkel" will
feature a western and patriotic theme.
*******************************************
LOSE YOUR CLASS RING?
Or have you found a ring but
don’t how to get it to the owner?
Follow this lead to get together!
http://www.geocities.com/hit_man_j/Class_Ring_Finder.html
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Hermits have no
peer pressure
***
Why is a
boxing ring square?
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OH, THANK YOU, THANK YOU! I NEEDED TO KNOW
THIS!
Italy
is smaller than the state of Montana
***
A 15-pound
turkey typically has about 70 per cent white meat
and 30 per cent dark meat.
***
The world's
first television weather chart was broadcast in Britain
in 1936.
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Fortune
Cookies
When I
let go of what I am, I become what I might be. Lao
Tzu
***
If we are
facing in the right direction, all we have to do is keep
on walking.
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Psalm
37:37
Consider the blameless, observe the upright;
there is a future for the man of peace.
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THE END OF THE FRENCH BASHING JOKES
We can always count on the French to
be there when they need US!
***
Why are all
the highways in France lined with trees?
So the Germans can march in the shade!!!
***
Q. How many Frenchman does it take to defend Paris.
A. We don't know, it's never been tried.
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OWIM (Oh Well It’s Monday)
Why is the alphabet in that order?
Is it because of that song?
*******************************************
 FLY THE FLAG! EVERY DAY IS A VETERANS
DAY
*******************************************
SUPPORT
THE TROOPS
At DefendAmerica you can send a Thank You Card
http://www.defendamerica.mil,
Over 6.7 million people have already signed it..
Just enter your name and location to send your thanks.
*******************************************
Click Here For : WHAT
IS AN AMERICAN
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(Let them know it's coming!)
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(The Small Print) Copyright 2003, The
MontanaFacts&Fun Newsletter. All rights reserved.
Information in this document is provided without warranty
of any kind, expressed or implied, including but not
limited to the implied warranties of , fitness for a
particular purpose and freedom from infringement. The
user assumes the entire risk as to the accuracy and the
use of material contained within this document. The
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use of this information, including, but not limited to
incidental, punitive, and consequential direct or
indirect, damages.
The
MontanaFun&Facts Newsletter has been serving Montana
for over six years with Wit, Wisdom, Business News and
Entertainment. This e-mail is never sent unsolicited; you
have received The MontanaFun&Facts Newsletter because
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you. To remove yourself from this list (or to add
yourself to the list if this message was forwarded to
you),
CLICK HERE! * Editor
Del Lonnquist
Thanks.
May good fortune smile on you the whole week through! Ed.
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SIGNS
OF OUR TIMES
Microbiology Lab:
Staph Only!
***
Editing
is a rewording activity
***
Help stamp out and eradicate superfluous redundancy.
***
It doesn't matter what temperature the room is, it's
always room
temperature.
***
I always
wanted to be a procrastinator but
never got around to it
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