Montana
Facts&Fun Newsletter
News /
Entertainment Weekly
* 6-9-03
Bad Joke Monday
Have you ever noticed that just one "line"
makes all the difference between Eat and Fat?
***
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Instructions For Life
It is wonderful to be in on the creation of something, see it used,
and then walk away and smile at it. Lady Bird Johnson
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Contest - Dinner for two
Perkins Family Restaurant and Bakery
Cedar Street & I-15 - Helena, Montana
Open 24 hours - Great Family Dining
Dinner includes entree, drinks and dessert.
Winner will be drawn at 5 PM Tuesday 6-10-03.
E-Mail name and phone number to: fortune@mtsky.com
Just say "YES, I'll take the dinner for two!"
This Weeks Winner - Bill Bahney - Bill Bahney & Associates
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Thoughts while waiting
for Mike Logan to say poems at the
Cowboy Entertainer Program in Townsend.
***
Man is so made that whenever anything fires his
soul, impossibilities vanish.
Jean de la Fontaine
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Man has no nobler function than to defend the truth.
Ruth McKenney
***
Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?
***
Judge not the horse by his saddle. Chinese Proverb
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Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition
from mediocre minds. Albert Einstein
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Thoughts while waiting for
the
Governors Cup 5 K to Start
I have always found that mercy bears richer fruits than strict justice.
Abraham Lincoln, 16th U.S. President (1809-1865)
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There would be no society if living together depended upon understanding
each other. Eric Hoffer, philosopher and author (1902-1983)
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Jokes that go over like a lead balloon
***
When my sister's husband died, she went to the bank to put his affairs in order.
The young clerk looked up their joint account and then asked,
"Which of you is deceased?"
***
Accounting: a-one, a-two, a-three, a-four...
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Love is grand; divorce is several hundred grand.
***
The trouble with life is there's no background music.
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Discretion is being able to raise your eyebrow instead of your voice.
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There is a guaranteed way to get what you want: want less.
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See The
Top 50 National & State Internet News Links Here!
www.CouponsMontana.com
***
Web Link Of The Week:
Learn CPR
http://depts.washington.edu/learncpr/index.html
This site is a free public service supported by the University of
Washington School of Medicine. Site provides you with the information
you need to learn the basics of cardiopulmonary resuscitation-CPR.
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Oh Thank You. Thank You, I needed to know this
The 'Kilroy' of 'Kilroy was here' fame refers to one James J. Kilroy,
a shipyard inspector from Massachusetts who marked his work thusly.
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Fortune
Cookies
What was hard to bear is sweet to remember.
***
Swords and guns have no eyes.
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A bit of fragrance always clings to the hand that gives the rose.
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Proverbs 25
A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.
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owim (Oh Well It’s Monday)
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of
nothing.
***
All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to
criticism.
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Words That Aren't - But Should Be
AQUADEXTROUS (ak wa deks' trus) adj.
Possessing the ability to turn
the bathtub faucet on and off with your toes.
***
ELBONICS (el bon' iks) n.
The actions of two people maneuvering for
one armrest in a movie theater.
***
FRUST (frust) n. The small line of debris that refuses to be swept
onto the dust pan and keeps backing a person across the room until he
finally
decides to give up and sweep it under the rug.
***
LACTOMANGULATION (lak' to man gyu lay' shun) n.
Manhandling the "open
here" spout on a milk container so badly
that one has to resort to the
'illegal' side.
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Thanks a lot for letting us come into your businesses and homes every
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(The Small Print) Copyright 2003, The Montana Facts & Fun Newsletter. All rights reserved.
Information in this document is provided without warranty
of any kind, expressed or implied, including but not
limited to the implied warranties of , fitness for a
particular purpose and freedom from infringement. The
user assumes the entire risk as to the accuracy and the
use of material contained within this document. The Montana Facts & Fun Newsletter, it's publishers and
sponsors will not be liable for damages arising from the
use of this information, including, but not limited to
incidental, punitive, and consequential direct or
indirect, damages.
The
Montana Fun & Facts Newsletter has been serving Montana
for over six years with Wit, Wisdom, Business News and
Entertainment. This e-mail is never sent unsolicited; you
have received The Newsletter because
you have subscribed to it or someone has forwarded it to
you.
To remove yourself from this list (or to add
yourself to the list if this message was forwarded to
you),
Put add me or subtract me in
subject line and push send * Editor
Del Lonnquist
Thanks.
May good fortune smile on you the whole week through! Ed.
©.Partners
of Success 2003. All rights reserved.
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