Montana Facts & Fun Newsletter

Montana Facts&Fun Newsletter
News & Entertainment Weekly   6-27-2005
FREE Ads - Our 8th year of publication in Helena, Montana! - Archives

Bad Joke Monday
Q. If an elephant didn't have a trunk, how would he smell?
A. He'd still smell terrible.

Photons have mass!? I didn't even know they were Catholic.

Any child can tell you that the sole purpose of a middle name
is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.

Today's Montana News, FAST!

Instructions For Life
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take,
but by the moments that take our breath away.

Everyday show your family how much you love them
with your words, your touch, your thoughtfulness.

FREE - Montana Classified Ads - Use Pictures & Color Too
No Pop Ups - No Banners - No Kidding - It's FREE
Get in here and sell something!

Helena WiFi Hot Spots
Bert & Ernies 361 N Last Chance Gulch
Downtown Helena 431 N Benton Ave
General Mercantile 413 N Last Chance Gulch
Gourmet to Go 48 N Last Chance Gulch
Nirvana - Great Northern Center
Sara's Blue Ribbon Porkies - 2104 N. Main
Staggering Ox Restaurant 400 Euclid Ave.
Taco DelSol 101 N Last Chance Gulch
Windbag Saloon 19 S Last Chance Gulch

WiFi In Most Other Montana Cities
E-mail if we're missing your favorite spot
(Thanks to Mike Allen for the WiFi listing idea)
**
Thoughts While Shaving
Faith is not believing that God can. It is knowing that God will. Ben Stein

The difference between perseverance and obstinacy is that
one comes from a strong will, and the other from a strong won't. Henry Ward Beecher

It has been scientifically proven that petting a cat can lower one's blood pressure.

I don't plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have face- lifts until my ears meet. Rita Rudner

The optimist says the glass is half full. The pessimist says the
glass is half empty. The pragmatist, being thirsty, drinks the water.

It's not the minutes you spend at the tab le that make you gain weight - it's the seconds.

Every crowd has a silver lining. P T Barnum

The Physical Inactivity Cost Calculator
Provides government leaders, policy-makers, and businesses a way to estimate
the financial costs of a physically inactive company or community.
Get the data needed to make your calculation here Montana Quick Facts

O W I M (Oh Well It's Monday)
Sign At Supermarket:
"Self-checkout available for your convenience." Ask for assistance.

How to become immortal: Read this tomorrow and follow its advice.

Why does the word "sanction" mean both to permit and to prohibit?

Montana Facts & Fun Web Site of the Week
Kim Komando's Summer Sites For Kids
http://www.komando.com/tips_show.asp?showID=8881
Summer fun for kids of all ages.

For Writers Only
Read over your compositions, and wherever you meet with a passage
which you think is particularly fine, strike it out. Samuel Johnson

The influence of each human being on others in this life is a kind of immortality. Adams

A synonym is a word you use in place of one you can't spell

Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time. Steven Wright

I have found that the greatest help in meeting any problem with decency
and self-respect and whatever courage is demanded, is to know where you yourself stand.
That is, to have in words what you believe and are acting from. William Faulkner

Service Tip Of The Week
Man is so made that whenever anything fires his soul,
impossibilities vanish. Jean de la Fontaine

Click Here For Clip Art Heaven

Jokes That Go Over Like A Lead Balloon
Redneck Computer Glossary
Hard drive" - Climbing a muddy hill with 3 flat tires and a trailer load of fertilizer.

"Keyboard" - Place to hang your truck keys.

"Window" - Place in the truck to hang your guns.

"Modem" - How you got rid of your dandelions.

  Classics From the Capital City
Tradition is what you resort to when you don't have the time or the money to do it right. Alder

A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable,
but more useful than a life spent doing nothing. George Bernard Shaw

Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it. Andre Gide

Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants,
today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing. Dave Barry

It is the mark of an educated mind
to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it. Aristotle
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Proverbs 15:17
Better a meal of vegetables where there is love than a fattened calf with hatred.
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Oh. Thank You, Thank You I Needed To Know This
President Grover Cleveland had the first telephone installed in the
White House in the late 1880's. He always answered the phone himself

Fred Cowie WiFi's at Nirvana

The Fortune Cookie
A great pleasure in life is doing what others say you can't.

Smile a frown may turn others away.

The Final Word From Treebranch
Save the world too often, and the world will begin to expect it.

We are what we repeatedly do.
Excellence is therefore not an act, but a habit. Aristotle

Montana Information
http://quickfacts.census.gov/qfd/states/30000.html

101 Local, State & National News & Information Sources

Recycle FREE at www.MontanaFree.com
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Special Sites
Chemo Heads .com

Fort Peck Boomtowns

JCTV Ch 34

Commercial Sites

All Sport Stadium Blankets

Amsoil Products

Auto Concepts

Benjamin Moore Paint Store

Bob’s Valley Market

Buglin' Bull Press

Cowboy Entertainer
Magazine

Danzer's Paint Store

Davisson, Ron & Lorna

Deer-D-Fence

Eric Wordal
Masterpiece Portraits

Go Fast Energy Drink

Grandstreet Theater

H & H Trikes Inc.

Lewis & Clark County
Humane Society

Mike Logan Cowboy Poet

Identity Theft Bob Pancich

Scuba Dive Montana

Steve Skains Flooring

Team Skains

Tizer Gardens

Townsend Personal Care

Wildlife Woodcarving

Woody's Car Wash

Montana Distance Calculator
Quickly Calculate Distance Between Major Montana Cities
Enter two cities and up comes the answer.
For Example:
The distance from Anaconda to Wolf Point is 494 miles.
Libby to Baker is 711 miles.

Smile! It Makes Them Wonder.
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May good fortune smile on you the whole week through! Treebranch
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