Montana Facts&Fun
                            News & Entertainment Weekly   8-29-2005
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                                            Bad Joke Monday
Doctors tell us there are over seven million people who are overweight,
Of course these are only round figures.
 
We're a fastidious couple.  She's fast ... I'm tedious.

                               
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                                          Instructions For Life
Remember the 3 R's - Respect for self; Respect for others; Responsibility for all your actions.

                          Quote Of The Week
Knowing the Bible is one thing. Knowing the Author is another!

Tact is the art of making a point without making an enemy. Howard W. Newton

                               Thoughts While Shaving

He who laughs, lasts. Mary Pettibone Poole

If people concentrated on the really important things in life, 
there'd be a shortage of fishing poles.

I'm tired of reality - I want a fairy godmother!

The past is a guidepost, not a hitching post. L. Thomas Holdcroft

A musician must make music, an artist must paint, a poet must write,
if he is to be ultimately at peace with himself.
What a man can be, he must be. Abraham Maslow

Be what you wish to be thought to be Cicero, 44 BC.

There are people who think that everything one does with a serious face is sensible. Lichtenberg

The most absurd and reckless aspirations have sometimes led to extraordinary success. Vauvenargues

Confusion is always the most honest response. Marty Indik

Consistency is the last refuge of the unimaginative.

                             
Jokes That Go Over Like A Lead Balloon

A duck walks into a pharmacy and says 
"I'd like some Chap Stick, and just put it on my bill!"

I admire the way he spends. He's a real credit to his card.

Maybe watched pots never boil, but those you don't watch
can make an awful mess on the stove.

                    Montana Facts & Fun Service Tip Of The Week
Too many people overvalue what they are not and undervalue what they are. Malcolm Forbes

Read, every day, something no one else is reading. Think, every day, something no one else is thinking. 
Do, every day, something no one else would be silly enough to do. 
It is bad for the mind to be always part of unanimity. Christopher Morley

                          Classics From The Capital City
If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind, 
what is the significance of a clean desk? Laurence J. Peter

But in this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes. Benjamin Franklin 

Humor is everywhere, in that there's irony in just about anything a human does. Bill Nye

Whenever you hear the consensus of scientists agrees on something or other,
  reach for your wallet, because you're being had. Michael Crichton

Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is very important that you do it. Mahatma Gandhi

Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't.  Erica Jong

The thing I hate about an argument is that it always interrupts a discussion. G. K. Chesterton

We can't change the winds but we can adjust our sails.

FREEDOM isn't FREE .... someone pays for you and me.

                          Montana Facts&Fun Web Site Of The Week - SAT Registration
The class of 2006 will be the first class to take the new SAT for college admissions.
Learn more about the SAT, register online, and get the latest information about the SAT Program. 
Register online and: Choose your test date and test center; Get immediate registration confirmation; 
Get recruited by colleges and universities. http://www.collegeboard.com/student/testing/sat/reg.html

                              Oh Thank You. Thank You, I needed to know this.
Your tongue print is as unique as your fingerprints.

Before the barometer was discovered, German meteorologists would predict air pressure
changes with frogs. Frogs croak when pressure drops.

                                 
Proverbs 11:14
For lack of guidance a nation falls, but many advisers make victory sure.


               
               O W I M (Oh Well It’s Monday)
Budget: An attempt to live below your yearnings.

Nothing is as embarrassing as watching your boss do something you said couldn't be done.

Would a pencil without lead be considered pointless.

                     The Fortune Cookie
Blowing out the other guy's candle won't cause yours to shine any brighter.

                    The Writer's Block
Because I've always felt, whether the fatwa or whatever, the writer's great weapon is the 
truth and integrity of his voice. And as long as what you're saying is what you truly, 
honestly believe to be the case, then whatever the consequences, that's fine. 
That's an honorable position.  Salman Rushdie

                             101 Local, State & National News & Information Sources

                                               
The Final Word From Treebranch
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
 
A synonym is a word you use if you can't spell the other one.

According to Nielson Media Research, the average person  watches television
about 4 hours per day - or, more precisely, 27 hours and 53 minutes a week.

In 10 years will radio stations be playing classic rap?

"Whoever said you can't buy happiness forgot about puppies."  Gene Hill

Take time to laugh - it is the music of the soul. From an old English prayer.

He who smiles rather than rages is always the stronger.    Japanese proverb

"Will and I could hardly wait for the morning to come to get at something 
that interested us. That's happiness."  Orville Wright, co-inventor of the airplane


                                              
The Physical Inactivity Cost Calculator
Provides government leaders, policy-makers, and businesses a way to estimate the 
financial costs of a physically inactive company or community.
Get the data needed to make your calculation here
Montana Quick Facts

                                            
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                        May good fortune smile on you the whole week through! Treebranch
                                          
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