Montana Facts&Fun
News &
Entertainment Weekly 10-16-06
Our 9th year of service
in Helena, Montana
Bad Joke Monday
* I like Bob Hope's answer when someone asks
"How's your golf game?"
He says, "If it was a boxing match they'd stop it."
* There are a lot of golfers at this
banquet.
I handed one guy the cream and sugar and he corrected my grip.
But I really knew he was a golfer
when he took three lumps of sugar and wrote down two.
* This guy can do more damage on a golf course
than lightning.
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Check Out Montana Voices - Oral
History Project
Haile Selassie Says:
Throughout history,
it has been the inaction of those who could have acted;
the indifference of those who should have known better;
the silence of the voice of justice when it mattered most;
that has made it possible for evil to triumph.
Today's Montana News Fast
Instructions For Life
It is easy
enough to be friendly to one's friends. But to befriend the one
who regards himself as your enemy is the quintessence of true religion.
The other is mere business. Mohandas K. Gandhi
Many live in the ivory
tower called reality;
they never venture on the open sea of thought. Francois Gautier
The higher we soar the
smaller we appear to those who cannot fly.
Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche
Classified ads for
Helena area no Charge!
Quote
Of The Week
"The world is a dangerous place to live, not because of the people
who are evil,
but because of the people who don't do anything about it." Einstein
WiFi HOTSPOTS
For Helena & all Montana
Thoughts While Shaving
A Scots pessimist is a man who feels badly when he feels good
for fear he'll feel worse when he feels better.
The person who says it cannot be done
should not interrupt the person doing it. Chinese proverb
Man has never made any material as resilient as the human spirit. Bernard
Williams
Pain is temporary, pride is forever. Anonymous
I love the man that can smile in trouble, that can gather strength
from distress, and grow brave by reflection. Thomas Paine
The self is not something that one finds. It is something that one
creates. Thomas Szasz
Rely on the ordinary virtues that intelligent, balanced human
beings
have relied on for centuries: common sense, thrift, realistic
expectations, patience, and perseverance. John C. Bogle
Jokes That Go Over Like A Lead
Balloon
Q: What is a polygon? A: A dead parrot!
Doctor, doctor I keep thinking I'm a bee
Buzz off can't you see I'm busy?
Doctor these pills you gave me for BO...
What's wrong with them?
They keep slipping out from under my arms!
Doctor, Doctor everyone keeps throwing me in the garbage.
Don't talk rubbish!
Buy - Sell - Trade - Give Away Do
It All Right Here
Good Service Tip Of The Week
He who has health has hope; and he who has hope, has everything.
Tap Here To Get Off Junk Mail Lists
Classics From The Capital City
Perseverance is a great element of success. If you only knock
long
enough at the gate, you are sure to wake up somebody. Longfellow
Anyone Without a Sense of Humor is at the Mercy of the Rest of
Us!
The best things in life aren't things. Art Buchwald
MontanaFacts Web Site Of The Week: AARP
Jobs For Seniors Over 55
Companies that look for senior citizens for their workforce.
http://www.aarp.org/money/careers/findingajob/featuredemployers/info.html
Oh Thank You. Thank You, I needed to know
this!
It takes about sixty three feet of wire to make
a SLINKY®.
The surface speed record on the moon is 10.56 miles
per hour.
It was set in a lunar rover.
"Blonde" is the word for a FEMALE with
yellow hair,
but "blond" is the word for MALES with the same color hair.
101 Local -
Regional - National - World Wide News Links
><>* <><* ><>*
<><
Proverbs 23:23
Buy the truth and do not sell it; get wisdom, discipline and understanding
><>* <><* ><>*
<><
OWIM (Oh Well It’s Monday)
Did you hear about the guy who blamed arithmetic for his
divorce.
His wife put two and two together
The Fortune Cookie (s)
Don't take down a fence until you know why it was put up.
Facts & Fun Newsletter
Archives
The Writer's Block
He who reigns within himself and rules his passions,
desires, and fears is more than a king. John Milton
"A thief believes everybody steals."
E.W. Howe
"I always turn to the sports pages first, which
records people's accomplishments.
The front page has nothing but man's failures." Chief Justice Earl
Warren
The key to success? Work hard, stay focused, and
marry a Kennedy.
Arnold Schwarzenegger
101 Local, State & National News &
Information Sources
The Final Word From
Treebranch
Why We Live In Montana
* Freeway congestion is getting so bad,
you can change a tire without losing your place in line.
* Traffic is always heavy in both directions. There are just as many
people
trying to get to whatever you're trying to get away from.
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Today's Montana News
Weather
for : Helena
Avon
| Clancy
Canyon
Creek
Canyon
Ferry | Corbin
East Helena | Elliston
Jefferson
City | Lincoln
Marysville
| Montana
City
Winston
| Silver
City | Toston
Townsend
| Unionville
Wolf
Creek | York
Military Weather
Bagdad,
Iraq
Serajevo, Bosnia
Ramstein, Germany
Yokota Air Base-Japan
Kabul, Afghanistan
******************
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