Bad Joke Monday
Q. If an elephant didn't have a trunk, how would he smell?
A. He'd still smell terrible.

Photons have mass!?  I didn't even know they were Catholic.

Any child can tell you that the sole purpose of a middle name
is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.
   
        Instructions For Life
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take,
but by the moments that take our breath away.

Everyday show your family how much you love them
with your words, your touch, your thoughtfulness.

                 
TWEET of the WEEK
Every crowd has a silver lining.  P T Barnum

AARP Montana On Facebook

  Thoughts While Climbing Mount Helena With The Kids And Grandkids
Faith is not believing that God can. It is knowing that God will.  Ben Stein

The difference between perseverance and obstinacy is that
one comes from a strong will, and the other from a strong won't. Henry Ward Beecher

It has been scientifically proven that petting a cat can lower one's blood pressure.

I don't plan to grow old gracefully. 
I plan to have face-lifts until my ears meet. Rita Rudner

The optimist says the glass is half full. The pessimist says the
glass is half empty. The pragmatist, being thirsty, drinks the water.

It's not the minutes you spend at the table that make you gain weight
it's the seconds.

                 Pennyman - The Novel  By Lonnie Lonnquist,  
                      Click Here To Read The First Chapter

         Jokes That Go Over Like A Lead Balloon
"Self-checkout available for your convenience."  (Ask for assistance.)

How to become immortal: Read this tomorrow and follow its advice.

Why does the word "sanction" mean both to permit and to prohibit?

                          American Heart - Video - John David

              Grin! It makes "them" wonder!

           Good Service Tip Of The Week
Man is so made that whenever anything fires his soul,
impossibilities  vanish. Jean de la Fontaine

       Classics From The Capital City
Tradition is what you resort to when
you don't have the time or the money to do it right. Alder

A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable,
but more useful than a life spent doing nothing. George Bernard Shaw

Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it. Andre Gide

Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants,
today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing. Dave Barry

It is the mark of an educated mind
to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it. Aristotle

            101 Quick Links To All Major News Sites
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                     Proverbs 15:17
Better a meal of vegetables where there is love than a fattened calf with hatred.
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We Do Websites, Call us at 406-495-9554  Fortune@MtSky.com

       Oh Thank You, Thank You, I needed to know this!
President Grover Cleveland had the first telephone installed in  the
White House in the late 1880's.  He always answered the phone himself

                                        The Writer's Block
Read over your compositions, and wherever you meet with a passage
which you think is particularly fine, strike it out. Samuel Johnson

The influence of each human being on others
in this life is a kind of immortality. Adams

A synonym is a word you use in place of one you can't spell

Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time.  Steven Wright

I have found that the greatest help in meeting any problem with decency and self-respect and whatever courage is demanded, is to know where you yourself stand.
That is, to have in words what you believe and are acting from. William Faulkner
                    

                Fortune Cookie(s)
A great pleasure in life is doing what others say you can't.

                (OWIM (Oh Well It’s Monday)
                Redneck Computer Glossary
Hard drive" - Climbing a muddy hill with 3 flat tires and a trailer load of fertilizer.

"Keyboard" - Place to hang your truck keys.

"Window" - Place in the truck to hang your guns.

"Modem" - How you got rid of your dandelions.

              The Final Word From Herb Treebranch
Save the world too often, and the world will begin to expect it.

We are what we repeatedly do.
Excellence is therefore not an act, but a habit.  Aristotle

Morning Jig Saw Puzzle 

Area Weather From National Weather Service
Helena | Avon | Clancy | Canyon Creek | Canyon Ferry | Corbin | East Helena
Elliston | Jefferson City | Lincoln | Marysville | Montana City | Winston
Silver City | Toston | Townsend | Unionville | Wolf Creek | York

Montana Weather For :Billings  | Bozeman   | Butte | Dillon | Glasgow
Great Falls  | Havre | Helena | Kalispell | Lewistown | Livingston  | Missoula

Freedom Force Weather
Bagdad, Iraq | Serajevo, Bosnia | Ramstein, Germany | Kabul, Afghanistan
Yokota Air Base Japan | Kunsan Base S. Korea | Shepherd Air Force Base-Texas
Elmendorf Air Force Base - Alaska | Minot Air Base - North Dakota

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May good fortune smile on you the whole week through! Treebranch
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